So full

I love how much my baby is moving the past few days. He hardly sleeps (just like mommy), but every little kick, push, flip and turn makes my heart so happy! I cannot believe in 16 weeks or less my precious little Bunky will be in our arms, our home and our lives. I love him beyond reason and I have not even officially met him. My heart is so full of love for God, my husband, my baby, my family and my friends. I feel so full of life, dreams and hope for the future that Jason and I are planning as a family.

As I typed this I thought back a few years ago, to a time where I did not have strong feelings about anything. I simply did. I went through the motions. I lacked passion, vision, and the will to change. I was on auto-pilot, and I liked that. Because, I was not hurting. But in all honesty you cannot, more importantly should not, live your life "just going through the motions". We must embrace each moment, good, bad and otherwise as they come, because this is the true beauty of living. Once I learned to feel again, I realized that I would never go back to auto-pilot. Several months ago, I grieved intensely, today I rejoice the same way. And that friends, is what life is all about!

Living Inspired

I dream of living an inspired life. What that means to me may be different than what it means to you. To me, it means I want to create. I want to live a life of beauty, not physical but seeing the beauty in the world around me. I want to feel lighthearted, more often than not. I want to look at the world as if it is magic and full of whimsy. I want adventure, not necessarily heart stopping adventures (although those are great too), but going new places, new experiences, etc. I want to live in the present and think how amazing this moment is, rather than always pushing for a great reward at the end or worse living firmly planted in the past. I want to work hard, but play even harder. I want to make a difference in the lives of others. I want to find inspiration in others, but not be jealous, because my life does not come close to resembling what I want it to be. I want to be an inspiration, the type of person that makes people want to live a life of joy, acceptance, peace and happiness.

I am getting there. I have found blogs and people in my life that inspire me. I have started to tap into my creative side. I am letting go of some of my reservations, breaking my own routines and molds. I want to create things, and have even bought some crafty stuff. But to be honest that is a work in progress. I realize how important it is to teach my son these things one day, and in my opinion the only way I can teach him is to live them out myself. Jason and my sweet unborn baby boy are my greatest inspiration, because I want to not only inspire them, but for them to be proud to say I "belong" to them!